I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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