Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
