No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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