i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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