That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
