i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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