I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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