if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
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