Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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