I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Randomize
