Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
