I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
