I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize
