Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize
