we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
