That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
