I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
