You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Small penises have feelings too.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
