Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
