they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
