It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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