So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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