Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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