Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We have so much sex to catch up on
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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