if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Randomize
