GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
