At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
