Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Randomize