Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
