..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i just google imaged poop.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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