My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
