Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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