She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
