Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Randomize