its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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