Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I wannas sexs uuuuu
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
