Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
