I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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