are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
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