He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize
