have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize