On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
