Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
