we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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