Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
