you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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