belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
