The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
