Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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