whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
